About Me: Legitimate Fears

In case you missed it, I recently started a little "About Me" series. I'm working through a list of things I want my kids to know about me. I thought it was sort of a cool getting-to-know-you project and would also be nice for this scrapbook that Reid will eventually look through.

Here's what I've done so far:

1. List 20 random facts about yourself.

2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears (graphic version)

Oh fears. I have a slew of them. =) I'm a big scaredy cat. I'll try to narrow it down to 3 - none of which are necessarily legitimate per se.

1) Fear Itself: This is probably the biggest of all. I have no real experience to tie to it or anything. I'm just scared of being scared. I dread staying home alone or walking in the dark because I hate the feeling of fear. I always know I'm going to be scared. I try to not even put myself in the position to feel scared. How ridiculous am I looking to you right about now?! Don't answer that. Moving on...

2) The Bad Guy: Ah yes. The big kahuna. I'm afraid of the bad guy. You know - the one that is standing over you with a knife when you wake up in the middle of the night, or the one that's waiting in the backseat of your car when you get into it first thing in the dark morning, or the one that breaks in your house while you're watching a freaky episode of Criminal Minds alone at night. Yep, that's the one. I think I may have just given you a glimpse into the "why" of this fear. =) I, thankfully, have no real first hand experience to cause such a fear but when you're me, who needs a real reason? It may have started as a kid when Jonbenet Ramsey was killed. She was in pageants and so was I (there's another random fact for ya). That made us alike and if it could happen to her, it could happen to me. I watch too much news now and apparently did back then too. I also watch too many crime shows. I don't know why I do that to myself except that I love them. Anyway, when I was in middle school/high school, The Profiler was on TV. I watched it and thus the fear of serial killers was born. Criminal Minds only confirmed that fear. Over and over and over again. 

3) Not Living God's Plan: I think this one is scary because I don't yet know what that plan is! How can I possibly do it if I don't know what it is!? Still, I feel like I'm failing. I know some people may not know that plan until they're 102... some may not know until they meet Him in Heaven. But what if I should already know and I missed the memo? What if I've wandered way off course and don't even know? Oy. That's a brain full. 

So there you have it! My legitimately illegitimate fears. =)